Women On Top

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Today many young men tell me that the new woman is too frightening, demanding; she wants it all, indeed she may have it all. Or will they regress, telling themselves what generations of well-intentioned mothers have believed, that in limiting their little girls’ sexuality they are protecting them for their own good? It would be foolish to think that a few decades of sexual celebration and tolerance could significantly alter our antisexual nature. Here is the most natural thing in the world—our own hand on our own genitals, doing something that gives us pleasure and harms no one, practicing the safest sex in the world—yet we feel guilty as thieves, our sense of self lessened when it should be heightened by mastery and self-love. That was your grandmother’s or great-grandmother’s time, when some of the most eminent, celebrated surgeons in the land routinely took knife in hand and skillfully removed various parts of a woman’s genitalia for reasons of insanity, hysteria, and oh yes, hygiene.

Let me quickly add that women editors as well as men hated the evidence of what women's sexual fantasies actually were. Beyond My Control: Forbidden Fantasies in an Uncensored Age shows that our fantasies are not compensation for a "missing" sex life but are a critical component of our fullest selves, the secret desires that yearn to soar. An ancient Egyptian god, so the myth goes, masturbates into his hand, puts his semen in his mouth, and spews it forth, creating a new race of people.Explicit, iconoclastic, often shocking, these erotic stories - angry, lustful, tender and dark - blow apart the old social and sexual taboos. I remember sitting next to a TV anchorman at dinner one night here in Key West, where I’m writing now.

Nor was there a single reference to women’s sexual fantasies in the card catalogues at the New York Public Library, the Yale University library, or the British Museum library, which carry millions upon millions of books—not a word on the sexual imagery in the minds of half the world. should conduct itself," [13] so too it ran into the difficulty of moralism versus human nature—the fact that "feminism—any political philosophy—does not adequately address sexual psychology" eventually sparking the ' feminist "sex wars" . Whatever popular support for sexual freedom the women in this book knew growing up, the very real, deep-down feel of this country, the fiber and character of the people, is modeled on a Calvinist work ethic and an inherent puritanical attitude toward sex. They have an ease with the subject of masturbation that is a pleasure to hear, a vocabulary so rich in description of when and how they masturbate that I am dazzled; their sexual fantasies soar into a realm of adventure that makes most of the reveries in My Secret Garden read like tentative stuff.By giving female readers a glimpse into the ordinary and often extraordinary fantasies of other women, it offers to some an exhilarating freedom from the guilt and shame so often associated with sexual fantasy—and to others, provides fascinating insight into the psychology of female sexual response.