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Figure out how you wish to use the vibrator (alone, for foreplay, or to finish) and what sensation you want. “Do you want a toy that really targets just the head of the clitoris—or the whole vulva?” Shannon asks. Direct pressure can feel great to some (which can be achieved with bullet vibrators and toys with pointed tips), while others may prefer a more diffuse vibration that spreads across the vulva (offered by most palm vibrators and clit suction toys with deep mouths that mimic the feeling of oral sex). Howard recommends setting the right atmosphere. “I'm very big on both the sensual and the sexual,” she says. “Light candles, make up your bed with nice sheets, put on some music. Really stimulate all your senses.” It should seem obvious, but a lot of people forgo proper sex toy care, especially if they’re only using it for masturbation. But it doesn’t matter if you’re the only one using the toy—if it’s going on or in your body, it should be clean. “Not cleaning your sex toy because you’re the only one using it is like eating with the same fork for a month and not washing it,” says Howard. “Sure, it’s only your spit on it, but would you do that? No.” Every bullet was tried by at least five people for several weeks, with every setting, claim and innovative feature put through its paces. Priyankaa has an MA in Magazine Journalism from Cardiff University and over five years’ experience in health and fitness journalism. Priyankaa has written for Stylist’s Strong Women Training Club, where she regularly wrote about diversity in the fitness industry, nutrition tips, training advice and her experience completing various fitness challenges. She has also written for a variety of publications including Business Insider, Glamour, Bustle, Metro, HuffPost UK, gal-dem and more.
The point of a sex toy might be to experience something completely different than what you can do on your own, and that’s cool too. But if you’re feeling overwhelmed when it comes to technique and you already know other forms of masturbation you enjoy, it can be helpful to start there. “Think about how you masturbate without a toy,” says Howard. What kind of stimulation do you like? Internal or external, gentle or firm, fast or slow...you get the idea. “From there, you can kind of gauge what you’re going to enjoy from a sex toy.” People skip this step all the time but shouldn’t! Chances are, your vibrator will come with a little booklet, including instructions for use and other important safety and maintenance information. In the very least, reading the instructions will give you a rundown of the controls. Believe me, you want to know before you play with it how to turn your vibrator on and off, as well as how to change between the various vibration patterns, if that’s something your toy has. 4. Don’t forget foreplay—even if you’re going solo.verifyErrors }}{{ message }}{{ /verifyErrors }}{{ Condoms are also useful if you want to use a toy for both vaginal and anal play (which you can do as long as the toy is anal safe). To avoid moving bacteria from your anus to your vagina or urethra (and risking vaginal infections like bacterial vaginosis or urinary tract infections, as SELF previously reported), use a new condom every time you’re switching holes. 10. Always clean and store it properly.
There’s a lot of vibrator fear-mongering out there, mostly from idiots who are threatened by female sexual empowerment. Worried that you might get addicted to a vibrator? Or that your male partners would be intimidated by your vibrator usage? Let’s bust through the BS and talk about how to make your vibrator a healthy part of your masturbatory life. What to Look for in Your First Vibrator Remember, always opt for toys made of sanitize-able, non-porous materials such as medical-grade silicone, hypoallergenic metals like stainless steel, and borosilicate glass. The best clitoral vibrators right now
O'Reilly also notes that these toys are a sexual game-changer for long-distance couples since many of them can be controlled via smartphone apps, Wi-Fi, or Bluetooth. "With permission, you can allow your lover to connect to your toy from anywhere in the world," she says. Long-distance sex anywhere? Yes, please. When it comes to lube, you have three main options: water-based, silicone-based, and oil-based. The biggest thing to keep in mind when pairing lube with toys is whether your lube is compatible with your toy, says Howard. With silicone toys, you want to avoid silicone-based lube, since that will erode the material. And if you’re using condoms on the toy (more on that later), stay away from oil-based lubes, since that can wear down the condoms and make them less effective. When in doubt, water-based lube is a solid choice. Also called clitoral vibrators, bullets come in all shapes and sizes. It’s one of the most versatile categories of sex toy, with everything from small, discreet options that are no bigger than a finger, to larger wands that double as massagers. Some have tiny “rabbit ears” – a nod to the classic rabbit vibrator – while others are topped with suction heads that use air to gently and safely stimulate the clitoris. How we test In purchasing your first vibrator, my first recommendation is that you make an investment. You may be tempted to buy something cheap if you’ve never used a sex toy before, but I really think you’re better served saving up your pennies to buy a high-quality product. More money typically buys more thoughtful design, a more powerful and durable motor, and body-safe materials. You won’t regret it. Even if you’re masturbating, condoms are helpful under a variety of circumstances. If you have a difficult-to-clean porous toy, condoms are an easy way to keep things nice and clean every time you use it.
If you’ve never used a vibrator before, you’re in for a treat. Vibrators create much more intense stimulation than fingers, tongues, or penises can. If you’ve never had an orgasm before, you may find it easier to have your first one with a vibrator. If you’re regularly able to orgasm in other ways, you may find your orgasms to be much more intense when they’re coming from a vibrator. There are women out there that just aren’t big vibrator fans (nothing wrong with that), but most women enjoy the sensation. Whether your sex life is burning hot or looking a bit dim, the best remote control vibrators can help heat things up. These high-tech vibrators, thrusters, and erogenous-zone stimulators can give you wall-clawing orgasms, no partner needed. But if you do want to add another person to the mix, these toys are a non-intimidating way to give your partner (or yourself) control in the bedroom, no matter if they're near or far. You might know from experience that even when you’re masturbating, you have to be in the mood, especially if you’re hoping to have an orgasm or two. Plus, it doesn’t hurt to loosen up and get some natural lubrication going. Oh, and in case you’re wondering, no, you won’t damage your nerve endings, no matter how intense of vibrations you use. That said, it’s possible to temporarily overstimulate yourself, which might mean you lose some feeling short-term. But don’t worry about any lasting damage. 8. Put a barrier between you and the vibrator if needed.If it’s your very first time using a vibrator, spend some time getting yourself warmed up and excited for this experience. This is going to be fun! Gently stroke all over your body, and spend some time caressing your labia and clitoris with your fingers. In short: get your own motor running before you turn on the battery-powered one.
Even if you’re not in the mood to whip out all the stops every time you want to use your vibrator, a little foreplay can go a long way. “Explore your body using the vibrator,” recommends Howard. “Try using it on the inner labia and outer labia and around the vaginal opening without actually inserting it—the whole area.” 5. Use lube, even if it’s just external. Have any other questions about masturbation? We’re doing a series of articles about it, so feel free to reach out if there’s a masturbation topic you’d like to see covered! Like most sex toys, you can use many of these orgasmic, remote-powered gadgets on a variety of erogenous zones, even if they're designed for a specific part of the body, according to O'Reilly. "A clitoral panty vibe can be used against the vulva, along the perineum, around the nipples, across the balls, or up and down the shaft of a penis," she says. With that being said, if a toy is made specifically for external use, don't try to insert it in any of your or your partner's orifices — that could potentially lead to injury and a mood-killing trip to the hospital. Let’s get one thing straight: there’s no conclusive evidence that shows that you can get “addicted” to your vibrator. That being said, it’s still a good idea to put some thought into how you would like vibrators to function in your sex life. Namely, do you want your orgasms to be the result of a vibrator, your own hands, your partner’s efforts, or a combination of the above?
Jess O'Reilly, PhD, a Toronto-based sexologist, says remote control vibrators are some of the most versatile sex toys on the market and can be used in endless ways to "facilitate playfulness" for the best sex ever, with or without a partner. "Not only does a remote control vibe allow you to weave eroticism throughout your day, but it often inspires you to flirt, tease, build anticipation and be more creative," she says.
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