Manhood: The Bare Reality

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WARNING: This review does contain pictures of penises. It may not be work safe. Be warned. There are no knob puns though. As a small child, you were told, ‘Big boys don’t cry.’ I think this is why men sometimes have a higher incidence of some of the serious illnesses because we don’t like to complain about being ill.”

All one hundred of these interviews are intimate and exploratory and give us candid, honest and sometimes difficult insights in what it means to be a man in the 21st Century. Manhood shows us the spectrum of ‘normal’, revealing men’s penises and bodies in all their diversity and glory, helping in dispelling body image anxiety and myths. I don't think one person can have the final say on what masculinity is, so instead there are 100 men's stories and voices. I don't think a clear definition of masculinity is required but I hope it gives readers more compassion and kindness for men in their lives and really raises some questions." Breasts and penises are not direct counterparts but both embody ideas of femininity and masculinity, womanhood and manhood, and offer intimate windows into our emotional and psychological worlds.”There was a whole spectrum of fathers in there - men talking about what a gift it is to be a father. How they want to be the best father they can be - to men in there who talk about not seeing their children either through their own choice." Men really opened up and discussed anxieties, OCD and full-blown depression and suicidal thoughts. There are a lot of mental health stories in the book. They all really opened up emotionally and it felt like a very rare glimpse into men's inner world. There are men in the book who say they have never talked about this to anybody."

In Manhood: The Bare Reality, photographer Laura Dodsworth views the concept of masculinity via the penis. I found myself less and less looking at the images of penises, and more just listening to their stories and more thinking about how far we have to go to be tender and connected with ourselves and each other. Perhaps male-identifying people have particular battles to fight in that regard. This was the opinion of many people in this book, certainly. I felt glad to hear their uncensored thoughts on these topics. It wasn't always comfortable to read - the views expressed in here were occasionally distressing to me - but I was glad to have it laid out anyway, and feel perhaps better able to have discussions with penis-owning people about these things now. I’m stealing a challenge from my friend, Dave Fuehrer: “If I can ask you to take one action, it is to admit to something that scares you. Admit it to a friend, to a partner, or to a piece of paper. But just admit it.” No matter if you’re talking to your male buddy, your wife, or a mashed up dead tree, it’s the first step in being a “transformational” man. Before Manhood came Bare Reality - where Laura interviewed 100 anonymous women and took pictures of their chests. She wanted to explore the dichotomy between how we feel about breasts privately and how they are presented for public consumption. It opened up a lot of interesting conversations about femininity, motherhood and sexuality. The classic social pressures mean that it can feel very shameful for a boy to… be perceived as weak.”Masculinity is such a big topic. I asked a lot of men, "what does it mean for you to be a man" - and their answers ranged from "tall, strong, hairy" to "being a provider, looking after your family" to "just being a good person. It's the same as being a woman".