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So I read everything I could get my hands on about the subject published by Christian sources. Some books left me more confused. Several confirmed my upbringing that sex is only enjoyable for men, if a woman receives pleasure just consider it a bonus. That the only goal in sex is to orgasm simultaneously and that a woman reaching climax through any means other than penetration is taking the easy way out. Then there were the books that made sex a duty for the woman to endure so she can be loved in the way she wants from her husband, that not having sex for pretty much any reason is disrespectful to her husband, and that men NEED sex regularly while a woman doesn't need it. Sex can be a powerful emotional experience and a great tool for protecting or improving health, and it’s certainly not only for the young. The need for intimacy is ageless. And studies now confirm that no matter what your gender, you can enjoy sex for as long as you wish. Naturally, sex at 70 or 80 may not be like it is at 20 or 30—but in some ways, it can be better. The path to satisfying sex as you age is not always smooth. Understanding the problems can be an effective first step to finding solutions. Before you put anything inside a vagina, it's important that you're fully, properly aroused. When you're aroused, the vagina expands and gets wet while the genital tissue becomes engorged with blood. This helps intercourse and penetration feel good rather than painful or uncomfortable. Be sure you're giving adequate time and attention to the clitoris. If possible, have an orgasm before penetration. Women and female-bodied people have orgasms most reliably through oral sex or with a sex toy. Make your pleasure a priority. 7. Expand Your Vocabulary Budweiser, S. et al. “Sleep Apnea is an Independent Correlate of Erectile and Sexual Dysfunction,” Journal of Sexual Medicine (2009) 6:3147.
One of the most destructive myths of porn is that it convinces so many guys that they’re too small,” Castleman says. “They forget that pornography is self-selecting...These are not average men. They’re the extreme end of the scale.”
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Medical conditions. Illnesses that involve the cardiovascular system, high blood pressure, diabetes, hormonal problems, depression, or anxiety can affect sex drive and function. You can talk to your doctor about strategies to combat these issues.
Change your routine. Simple, creative changes can improve your sex life. Change the time of day when you have sex to a time when you have more energy. For example, try being intimate in the morning rather than at the end of a long day. Lies we’ve been fed in the most popular Christian sex & marriage books are uncovered, and exposed for what they are Rarely do I read a book that shakes me to my core and totally changes my paradigm. The Great Sex Rescue, however, did just that. IT KEEPS YOU FITMaking love a couple of times a week cuts your risk of heart disease and strokes by half, says a study from the New England Research Institution Massachusetts, in the US. ‘It improves muscle tone, flexibility and circulation, plus it raises your heart rate, which is good for you cardiovascular health,’ explains JuliePeasgood, author of The Greatest Sex Tips in the World.This book has made me cringe from the many examples from other books that have been written, that talk about sex, and the stories from other women and how they have been taught that they must be in a marriage. I have cried from some of these same stories that show women were treated like objects for sex. To think that this is and has been taught for years in best selling books by well known authors is heartbreaking. How having more sex can improve your health, mood and even your career Problem: We have sex less often Increase your activity level. Bumping up your general level of activity will benefit your sex drive by increasing your energy and sense of well-being. Most men suffer from erection problems at some point in their lives, but getting older can make it more difficult to get and sustain an erection on a regular basis.
Women are given a beautiful picture of shame-free, passionate sex but then are bombarded by dangerous teaching rampant in these same books: it’s her duty to give him sex when he asks, regardless of how she feels; sex is something he will take from her because he needs it so badly; all men lust, so she needs to do her part if she wants her husband to stay faithful. Our theology of sex has to go beyond the creation story in Genesis, of being naked and not ashamed, and encompass so much more.” It’s also well worth doing pelvic floor exercises, because the stronger these muscles are in both sexes the better sexual function and orgasm. Emotional obstacles. Stress, anxiety, and depression can affect your interest in sex and your ability to become aroused. Psychological changes may even interfere with your ability to connect emotionally with your partner. Or it can be a side-effect of some prescription medication. So it’s important to muster the courage to see your GP.Right. The mouth. Useful for kissing and other orally administered forms of arousal (none of which should be underestimated), it’s also a tool for communication. Try it. Tell them what you want. Ask them what they like. Shoot for trust and openness. Increase lifespan. Through its health-improving benefits, a good sex life can add years to your life.
All of the reaffirmed to me how bad of a wife I was being. I questioned myself constantly if I was giving my husband enough sex. If I was pleasing him enough. If during the times I was dealing the trauma of my past and I would literally shut down during sex (in the effort of transparency, let me just say I was raised in a home that dished out every form of abuse except physical and the trauma of that lingers to this day. And yes, I've been in trauma therapy. Unfortunately, there will always be fall out in various forms from the abuse depending on what's going on in life and stored body memories and all that) if that was dishonoring to him/living in the past/not being respectful to him. Wow, wow, wow! Both my husband and I couldn’t put this book down! I would highly recommend this book for anyone (men, women, couples) who desire to love their spouse well and seek after God’s heart for their marriage; especially if you or your spouse grew up in the evangelical church or purity culture and have been hurt by some of those teaching. Whether you are engaged and you want your marriage and s-x life to start out well, or you are in a great marriage and want to continue growing in intimacy and digging out any weeds that might poke their heads up, or you are in a difficult marriage and want to find healing and a healthy path forward, or you are divorced and need the healing light of Jesus to touch your broken and hurting heart, or you are in a Christian leadership or ministry position and want to know how to better support those under your care. This book is for you; each one of you. What sounds rote and dreary can actually be dreamy, says Michael Castleman, who recommends the strategy especially to couples in long-term relationships, who’ve passed the can’t-keep-their-hands-off-each-other phase. A practical guide to understanding teens from bestselling author and global youth advocate Josh Shipp. Sexuality necessarily takes on a broader definition as we age. Try to open up to the idea that sex can mean many things, and that closeness with a partner can be expressed in many ways.
Great sex is in the eye of the beholder, or the be-hander,” says Patti Britton, a clinical sexologist and author of The Art of Sex Coaching. “For some men, it might be the ability to produce fantabulous multiple orgasms in their partner. For other men, it might mean being able to last three minutes. Being a great lover means becoming a great lover to your particular partner, and that requires doing something very difficult: opening your mouth.” For women who are experiencing some of the problems in the book, this would probably be helpful to read, but only if your husband had the capacity to listen and care. If that wasn't the case, this would be just another book that women read and get more frustrated and sad about their situations. (Why is it that the women are typically the ones reading, anyway?!!?) Sheila Wray Gregoire, Rebecca Gregoire Lindenbach, and Joanna Sawatsky are powerfully combining Scripture and science to point out some naked emperors within evangelical teaching as well as reveal the often missing perspectives of Christian wives. They use high quality data to show the fruits of widely accepted, extra-biblical messages and continuously balance against Christ's example for how we are to treat one another. This is a comprehensive review of bestselling Christian literature that is likely to cause quite a stir, and God-willing a shaking as they wrestle with: If you can exercise hard enough to work up a light sweat without triggering symptoms, you should be safe to have sex.
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