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It’s the middle of season 2, and Issa (Issa Rae) is stuck in a Ferris wheel carousel at Coachella with Nathan (Kendrick Sampson) when the two realize they’re totally alone, and, well, let’s just say that things ensue.

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Sometimes a little risqué reminiscing is all you need to remind yourself that you are, in fact, a sexual being who is capable of horniness. The classic sex toy is a favorite for a reason, and a really good item to have in your arsenal for those times when arousal doesn’t just happen. Relaxing and de-stressing is 101 when it comes to arousal, so if luxe baths are your thing, consider hopping into one before opting for sexy time. You’ll want to create a private file on your phone—whether via an app, the Notes tab, or a camera album—to compile a bunch of things that turn you on for moments like this. Erika Lust is a total badass who makes feminist porn, aka porn in which women are the focus, and they actually look like they’re getting turned on and getting off.

Use really great-smelling bath stuff, put lotion on every single part of your body afterward, and just be with yourself. Living in tiny apartments or with roommates can be stressful enough; you don’t need to worry about your neighbors listening to your sighs and moans when you finally get into the mood.

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The majesty and ART of a naked Channing Tatum stripping onscreen will get the job done for generations. Focusing on your breath is the most direct way to get out of your head and into your body,” says Menezes. It’s good in the moment, and you can always reread through the hot messages you exchanged afterward,” she explains. According to a very official(ish) Cosmo poll, most of you like lounging around in your lingerie when you’re alone anyway. I’m not saying you should put on The Muppet Movie soundtrack, but it can be whatever you feel like at the moment.

If not, you’ve still taken the time to indulge yourself in some hot thoughts that can steam up your next self-pleasure session or lead you to a closer understanding of what you wanna try next in bed. Oh, and there’s also a section where you can listen to sexy stories which is *chef’s kiss* in a pinch.

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There’s something special about the act of taking photos,” says Sadie Allison, PhD, founder of GoLove CBD. Brito agrees that it could be due to a medical issue, but if it’s not, then “then seeking a psychotherapist could help you to uncover emotional blocks or explore relationship barriers that may be impacting your libido. And honestly, sometimes the hookups on Netflix are even hotter than the stuff in porn because you’re so emotionally invested in the characters. Taking photos allows you to celebrate your body and simultaneously see yourself as the coveted object of desire you are, she explains. Yup, just like there are great songs to have sex to, there are great songs to masturbate to as well.Yes, drafting a sext to yourself can be a fun and potentially titillating exercise, but there’s nothing wrong with asking for a little help. Maybe it was during a particularly steamy sex sesh, maybe it was an unexpected, mid-day fantasy that had you suddenly reaching for the nearest vibrator.