Roots and Wings

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WINNER of the Corporate Live Wire Global Awards 2023/24 under the category of ‘Clinical Psychology Service of the Year’ We are so delighted to be the proud new sponsors of the Lewes Lionesses Rugby team. We share this honour alongside the fabulous www.stupidegg.co.uk (Sussex-based purveyors of the most BEAUTIFUL houseplants, pots and accessories) and www.ptjsussex.com (Lewes-based building contractor). Wishing the girls a super successful season! https://www.bbc.co.uk/newsround/13865002?fbclid=IwAR3EbeOh2LGttpmLJiZygrvYlhsb9MURZRRJn45hDKkfkX9I7Ub2UdPoyNc

One of the fundamental goals and responsibilities for me as a parent for the last 25 years has been the idea of giving my children Roots and Wings. To raise them in a way that they feel they have a strong sense of self and of belonging and at the same time instilling in them through unconditional love, trust and respect the confidence to truly spread their wings and fly. I’m not sure I’ve done this consciously over the years but I’ve certainly been able to articulate it more coherently recently. A less obvious example, however, would be the tendency we have as humans to tolerate situations that are no longer good for us, because chronic exposure to them wears away our ability to “see the wood for the trees” or to hold on to a belief that we could even aim for something better or one that is more in line with our values. I found myself in this very position not too long ago. At this time, I was in a very challenging role, heading up an NHS service that, whilst extremely admirable in its objectives, I felt was well beyond the scope of the resources allocated to it. Very early on in this role, I feared that the support that my team could practically offer to the young people and professionals that needed our service, was a mere drop in the ocean compared to what we could realistically deliver. There just wasn’t enough of us to go around. This was a horrible feeling for me and one that I just couldn’t make my peace with. Despite being surrounded with wonderful and committed colleagues, including many who tried to convince me that what I was offering was enough, I was frequently left feeling powerless, hopeless and burnt out.

Touching Wings And Roots Quotes For All

Part of my role as a Clinical Psychologist, therefore, is to help parents, carers and professionals, to find new and more effective ways of supporting children to reach their full potential. One of the most frequently asked questions put to me in clinic, is why some children do not respond to traditional reward/punishment based behavioural strategies. The answer is simple – because, contrary to popular opinion, these strategies do not work for all children in all situations. My understanding of the quote: Roots, which would allow our children to stand firmly and to steadfastly hold their grounds in a world which is constantly trying to change them into something else. And Wings, which allow them to soar to great height, freely, unbounded and far away.

When a child (or their parent) notices that they are starting to become distressed (or to ‘fall out of their window of optimum arousal’), they can be supported to try the TIPP approach: The youth of our country has the opportunity to go forward in many fields, which will be a trying challenge. A wise woman once said, “There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots, the other wings.” Good parents give their children roots and wings: roots to know where home is, and wings to fly off and practice what has been taught them.Much better, is to side-step the “why” question altogether with young children (e.g. “what made you do that?” or “when you did that, what did you think might happen?”) These kinds of questions keep the dialogue flowing and importantly, help the child to start to understand for themselves what their thoughts, feelings and motivations were when they used a particular behaviour.

Everywhere I look at the moment I see little signs of new life, new growth and new potential. You have to look hard for it sometimes, but for me, Spring is such a great metaphor for a sense of hope and optimism following a harsher, darker time. Firstly, invite the child to imagine that they are a whale swimming around in the ocean. Then, as they breathe out, encourage them to imagine that they are blowing all the tension out of the top of their head, a bit like how the whale might blow water out of it’s blow hole. This is such a simple technique, but is surprisingly effective! Selma Fraiberg (1987) emotively referred to this phenomenon as “ghosts in the nursery” – the idea that without conscious effort to alter entrenched family patterns, family life can essentially become a ‘rehearsal’ for the next generation. More commonly, we refer to this phenomenon as the enactment of ‘family scripts’. John Byng-Hall (1985) proposed three ways in which these family scripts may manifest –For some parent-child dyads however, things do not go so well. Some parents may face unmanageable levels of stress whilst caring for their infants, which may be exacerbated by their own poorly developed care and emotional-regulation systems. Others may be offering reparative foster parenting to children who, owing to previous experiences of abusive or neglectful parenting, now fear, mistrust and reject the care they are being offered, which can be extremely painful for their new carers to bear. The Child Reading System: The system that enables parents to positively interpret our child’s behaviours and motivations and to remain interested in their unique qualities. So today marks the second birthday of Roots and Wings Clinical Psychology, Ltd. And what a journey it has been! Having received over 300 referrals since opening in January 2019, it has been an absolute pleasure and honour to support so many children, young people and their families towards achieving better mental health. I learn so much from each young person that I work alongside, and am always quietly humbled by their bravery and resilience – often a long time before they even recognise this for themselves. My role in helping children and families at such an early stage in their lives might not always be easy, but it is always an absolute privilege. I am partial to a quotation from Henry Ward Beecher: “There are only two lasting bequests we can give our children. One of these is roots . . . the other, wings.” My parents had truly given me the former; now they were making the most difficult gift a mother or father can provide, the gift of wings.