I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn't): Making the Journey from "What Will People Think?" to "I Am Enough"

Product Information

I forget what other book or talk I’d first heard this. For me, someone who doesn't personalize what's happened. I think this made recognizing personal shame a little tougher if at all. Even focusing on the shame that we take on board/adopt/feel when we find ourselves in carer roles for ageing loved ones. I was surprised, and grateful to have this discussed.

I Thought It Was Just Me: Women Reclaiming Power and Co… I Thought It Was Just Me: Women Reclaiming Power and Co…

Secondly, the reason I was in two parts about this book is because; as the title suggests, there are a lot of different accounts of Shame through people that Brown has interviewed, throughout the book you hear their stories, all the different places in which people feel shame, this was beautiful in a sense that it does lift you out of your own corner of shame and isolation, it also gave voice to emotions that I was feeling that I could not articulate myself. Listening to all the different subtleties of Shame as well really bring into light how much of a Shame Web we actually can find ourselves in without even realising it. Shame manifests through various symptoms: red face and shaking, difficulty swallowing, and even more extreme ones like the inability to even get out of bed. She went on to explain that she knew they only had a short lunch break and that the pizza was a major incentive for them to be there at all. By pointing this out, she was displaying critical awareness. This all-important ability refers to understanding both why and how something happens. Brown, B. (2007). I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Making the Journey from “What Will People Think?” to “I Am Enough”. New York, USA: Penguin.

Chief Editor

The role of self-compassion: Brown argues that self-compassion is critical for overcoming shame, and provides tips for cultivating self-compassion and learning to treat oneself with kindness and understanding.

I Thought It Was Just Me Summary - Accept Your Flaws - Pickyreads I Thought It Was Just Me Summary - Accept Your Flaws - Pickyreads

As someone who wisely chose to reject some damaging expectations, I found a lot of truth echoed in this passage: "There are times when our feelings, thoughts and actions relate directly to our past or current struggles. But there are certainly times when they don't. The problem arises because, at some point, most of us begin to believe the expectations about who we're supposed to be, what we're supposed to look like, what we're supposed to do, how much we're supposed to be and how little we're supposed to be. We also develop a fear of rejecting those expectations. We constantly see evidence that if we do reject these expectations, we will experience very painful disconnections and rejection. So we internalize these expectations and they become an emotional prison. Shame stands guard." (p. 228) of 5 stars 2 of 5 stars 3 of 5 stars 4 of 5 stars 5 of 5 stars I Thought It Was Just Me: Women Reclaiming Power and Courage in a Culture of Shame by Brené Brown Have you ever felt like you’re coming down with some sort of illness, but just decided to ignore it? If you have, you likely learned that listening to yourself is important to your physical health – and the same goes for your mental health.However, achieving this kind of comprehension is not easy. To do that, you need to possess the ability to put yourself in the shoes of the other person and see things from their perspective. The majority of shame researchers agree that the difference between shame and guilt is best understood as the differences between “I am bad” (shame) and “I did something bad” (guilt). Shame is about who we are and guilt is about our behaviors.” Now, if you found a moment like that, then you are probably already wishing for the earth to swallow you as you cannot stop yourself from replaying the situation over and over again in your mind.

I Thought It Was Just Me Summary - Four Minute Books I Thought It Was Just Me Summary - Four Minute Books

You have to forget about judgment and be fully present in the moment, and aware of the other person’s words and emotions. Key Lessons from “I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t)” the psychological identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another” ~ Dictionary.com Brené Brown is a bestselling author and a research professor at the University of Houston. Her TEDXHouston Talk is one of the videos with the highest number of views on TED.com. “I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t) Summary” But Brown says the way through is sharing those uncomfortable feelings with others. One of the solutions to shame is empathy and another is self awareness. Knowing that none of us is immune to shame brings us to the conclusion that the important thing is not stopping shame from occurring (since it cannot be done), but learning how to manage it.

You can also read the book The Go-Giver Summary. Who would I recommend the I Thought It Was Just Me Summary to? I've read and heard Ms Brown speak on this topic often. The core of what I've learned about shame comes when someone personalized they're bad for what has occurred verses this was an action of the individual or someone else that impacts the recipients interpretation. Brown has discovered another hurdle in her research- it can be difficult to speak about shame as words sometimes fail us when we experience visceral feelings. This book offers information, insight and specific strategies for understanding shame and building "shame resilience." We can never become completely resistant to shame; however, we can develop the resilience we need to recognize shame, move through it constructively and grow from our experiences." pg xiv