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52 Times Britain was a Bellend: The History You Didn't Get Taught At School

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All those flag shaggers pontificating about sovereignty and how they personally liberated Western Europe at the end of the second world war need to read this, particularly around Britain's role in drug wars, concentration camps, and recompensing slave owners rather than slaves at the end of slavery. Nuance is a definite casualty within this book. These events can't exactly be excused, but giving the rationale behind the actions would be helpful, as Felton's prose makes it look as if Britain was being capricious at best, or malevolent for the sake of it, at worst. If he had actually gone into things in any depth then it would be easier to learn from his work. I’m already a bit of a history nerd, so I didn’t need this book to magically make me fall in love with the subject.

For anyone with a good knowledge of history, you won't learn anything new in here. For those who would like a deeper and more nuanced look at these events, you'll also be disappointed. TIMES BRITAIN WAS A BELLEND will complete your knowledge of this sceptred isle in ways you never expected. So if you've ever wondered how we put the 'Great' in 'Great Britain', wonder no more . . . Andy Thistlewood, head of development for Open Mike, says: " James Felton's book is laugh-out-loud funny, so naturally we wanted to exploit his genius! James expertly weaves fascinating historical nuggets of Britain's bellendery with some obscenely funny jokes, so we're confident that his book will transfer perfectly to TV. Just when we thought we couldn't be more concerned about Britain's global reputation, James comes along to show us that we need not worry - Britain has always been a bit of a bellend." A TV series based on the book by James Felton, which focuses on the "painfully funny history of Britain you were never taught at school". A great combination of lively writing and painfully accurate history easily digested in an evening.

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We have gone round the world like a spoiled brat, taking and smashing other people's things in petulant ridiculous rages. While told in quite an amusing manner, the litany of actions, ranging from full on atrocaities to blatent stupidity, most of which spurred by a selfish, petty, greedy, entitled behaviour is sobering. TIMES BRITAIN WAS A BELLEND will complete your knowledge of this sceptred isle in ways you never expected. So if you’ve ever wondered how we put the ‘Great’ in ‘Great Britain’, wonder no more . . .

Jingoistic notions of British exceptionalism and misguided notions of a benign British Empire have been fostered by populist demagogues like Johnson. However, if you’re not in the same boat as me (or indeed, even if you are) please see the following reasons for why I think this book is a must read; This is only a short list of "highlights" shall we say. The delusion of "British Greatness" that we tell ourselves is the cause of our own current crises and won't be fixed until as a society and a culture, we stop lying to ourselves. We've been lying for a long time though. As such, it is clearly not worth much to have merely theoretical sovereignty in the sense of unenforceable rights, such as the UK has acquired for itself by Brexit. What obviously counts, rather, is the actual ability of a state to influence the world around it such that its interests are safeguarded, and if this is more effectively achieved by membership in a supranational union, then the purpose of sovereignty is clearly attained, even though the formal description of such a state would, to the clueless observer, suggest that its freedom is reduced. It’s about time I learnt what my history classes at school failed to teach me. I read an article in the Guardian recently that pointed out that most British history syllabuses completely skip over Britain’s role in its colonies and the slave trade, putting the onus on glorifying British Abolitionists such as Wilberforce. As we studied only one short module on the Agrarian and Industrial Revolution and the Peninsular Wars, even Wilberforce was relegated to a single sentence, shared with Shaftesbury and child labour reforms. Obviously I have learnt more in the course of my lifetime, but only in the past few years has it occurred to me just how little I know, given I’m interested in history. We went to a small museum in the north of England which had a major display about the slave trade and trading triangle and I was amazed because I had never heard of that and never associated slavery with Great Britain. My viewpoint has been changing and I think this slim and irreverent volume may teach me a great deal about the reality.From a British POV - a lot of this history was skimmed over, or not even taught in school (cough, COLONIALISM, cough). I actually ended up studying Russian and German history in more depth in my later years of education - while this was definitely interesting, I would have preferred to know more about the country in which I reside. This is a good introduction to that, and I look forward to finding out more, however negative or positive it is. Britain may have done some good things, but we also did some bad things - in the case of the Indian famine even while we were doing good thigs (helping to defeat Hitler) we were doing bad things (letting millions die). If we cannot critically examine our own pasts as nations and as people, then we deny ourselves the scope for growth and instead fall into the hubris of unthinking pride. It presents history concisely and humorously. History is often seen as dry and presented in these tomes wider than your hand. Each of the 52 items are presented in a few paragraphs. The tone is lighthearted and it’s entertaining. Perhaps it detracts from the seriousness of the issues ever so slightly, but I heartily enjoyed it nonetheless.

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