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Helping Your Child with Fears and Worries 2nd Edition: A self-help guide for parents

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Parents and carers can get help and advice about children's mental health from Young Minds' free parent helpline on 0808 802 5544, from Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 4pm. Repeated routines or rituals that impact on a young person’s day such as being on time for or coping at school, being able to socialise and engage in hobbies or interests, being able to get up or go to sleep. First and foremost, it's important to talk to your child about their anxiety or worries. Reassure them and show them you understand how they feel.

The degree to which a young person worries appears out of context or disproportionate to the reason why they might be worrying. Episodes of anxiety might be more frequent or prolonged and cause the young person distress or might have some mild impact on their ability to cope with everyday life such as going to or coping at school, seeing friends or taking part in leisure activities. Examples might be:

When is anxiety a problem for children?

A visit to a GP is a good place to start. If your child's anxiety is affecting their school life, it's a good idea to talk to their school as well. turn an empty tissue box into a "worry" box. Get your child to write about or draw their worries and "post" them into the box. Then you can sort through the box together at the end of the day or week Anxiety is a normal human response to feeling threatened or in danger, even if that threat or danger is a thought, image or memory. Anxiety can become a real problem if the thoughts, emotions (feelings) and physical sensations are very strong, happen even when there is no real danger or if it lasts for a long time. Families will find themselves struggling to do things as they normally would, that family functioning is disrupted and they are required to make significant adjustments to accommodate how the young person is feeling or responding

Thoughts and beliefs are rigid and cannot be challenged or thought about from a different perspective (e.g., 100% belief that something bad will happen).If your child is old enough, it may help to explain what anxiety is and the physical effects it has on our bodies. It may be helpful to describe anxiety as being like a wave that builds up and then ebbs away again. Ask what's on their minds. Help kids label what they think and feel. They might not always have a lot to say. And they might not always want to talk about what's on their minds. But let kids know you're open to listening and talking any time. if your child is anxious because of distressing events, such as a bereavement or separation, look for books or films that will help them to understand their feelings

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