Useless Magic: Lyrics and Poetry

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I’m sorry you couldn’t find me. I have been in the woods. I put myself there because I couldn’t be good. I have been running with foxes and running with crows and I have found myself a home where no one goes.” I have compiled this list of 100 mostly useless magic items from this thread: http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showt...ss-Magic-Items Wand of Silent Image: This wand, made of a rare and exotic wood, is inlaid with intricate filigrees of colored gold (blue, green, white, and rose gold in addition to pure gold) that depict climbing morning glory vines, and is capped with a sapphire worth 200 gp. Engraved in fine elvish script on a ring-sized, well-worn gold band around the center of the wand, the only part of the wand that shows any sign of age, are the closing words of a High Elven wedding vow. The wand holds 10 charges, and regains 1d10 charges per long rest. When used, it invariably creates an image within 10ft of the caster of a plain-looking young human woman dressed in peasant's clothing placing a morning glory flower in her hair, smiling shyly to the caster, and waving in greeting, then fading away in the same round as the wand was used. No amount of magical skill short of direct action by a deity can make it change the image it produces. Camel of Water Storage: A magical, living camel, that can drink several hundred gallons of water and store them indefinitely, for the owner to retrieve when needed. The method of retrieval is, however, not for the faint-hearted. Shield of Sneaky Heraldry: This enchanted shield can magically change its heraldry whenever the wearer wants to, bringing confusion to the enemy on the battlefield (and possibly to friendly forces as well).

Hilariously Useless Magical Items - Post your ideas! : r/DnD Hilariously Useless Magical Items - Post your ideas! : r/DnD

Screaming sword, A fine tiefling made longsword. Once unsheathed it will inflict 1 sonic damage to the wielder per turn unsheathed. Sword does an additional 1d4 sonic damage on hit. Drumkit of Dolphin Summoning: Does exactly what it says on the tin. Quite what the party are supposed to do with the 4D20 dolphins that have just entered the material plane is anyone's guessScarlet Salmon, a wand that looks suspiciously like a small fishing rod. It gives the user the ability to create one red flying fish illusion, range 60ft.

Florence Welch - Useless Magic Lyrics and Tracklist | Genius

Shirt of Throwing: This simple green shirt is the perfect size for the average Halfling, Gnome, or Dwarf. When donned, the wearer can be used as a thrown missile. The wearer's range increment increases by 50ft when thrown. Ring of Water Stain: This ring causes all beverages held by the wearer to leave a ring shaped stain on any surface it is placed on God knows how I managed to acquire a copy of this a week before its publication fate – bought it at the same time as I bought the latest album, High as Hope. Foyles on Charing Cross Road had a few rogue copies out so I bought one before they realised what they’d done.)) Arsonist's Tinderbox: An otherwise innocuous tinderbox that sets fire to everything - flammable or not - in a 20' radius. Shoes of serpents, finely crafted crocodile hide boots. Once per day a small corn snake can be summoned from the boot.Mirror of Positive Reinforcement. A mirror that doles out positive reinforcement and life advice. Mirrored self appears to always be smiling and wants you to know he has two thumbs.

Useless Magic: Lyrics and Poetry by Florence Welch | Goodreads

Dr Widdershin’s Invisibility Ingress Potions, Potions of invisibility that nearly work. They will instead turn you semi transparent. Macs of the Dwarvish Lords - Raincloaks of suitable size for a dwarf that will only open for a member of the dwarven nobility. Rod of Absolute Length: On pronouncement of a command word, the rod changes from a length of 1 foot to a length of 12 inches. Ax of Armistice, A well made steel greataxe made by tieflings. +1 to intimidation +1 to hit, if an enemy is killed with this axe all extra damage is carried over to another enemy within 10ft. On daily attunement, make a DC10 charisma saving throw, if failed the user will attempt peace first until they are hit for any damage or are persuaded to attempt violence DC10. The Ultimate Book of Ultimate Law: the text of every law ever enacted, anywhere, anywhen. It is arranged alphabetically by the words of the first sentence in the law with no index or table of contents.

According to some online quiz, I'm a 6th level TN Wizard. They didn't give me full XP for all the monsters I've defeated while daydreaming. Wand of Routing: When you use the Wand of Routing, you and all your allies within 30 feet most succeed on a DC 15 Wisdom save or become Frightened, and must flee the current fight post haste. Cubefinder (Consumable): A 10ft pole with one end capped by a caked-on powdery substance. When you are holding it in front of you and feel it hit something unseen, look at the cap. If you see and hear the cap fizzing like crazy while the pole starts to dissolve, you've found a Gelatinous Cube. Candle of Incandescence: an apparently normal candle until lit, then everyone in 10' radius gets very cross indeed Dyson of dead sun, A crystal ball that contains different scenery every time it’s used. When shook, a large thaumaturgical or nuclear explosion takes place and the scenery changes inside the sphere.