The F*ck It Diet: Eating Should Be Easy

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I’ve had body image issues my whole life for reasons I won’t go into here. But I’m taking control now. I still want to be thin because that’s how I like to see myself, but not because that’s what others want or expect of me. And I’m willing now to trust my body and give it what it wants and let it do its thing. I ride my Peloton bike because I feel stronger each time. Not because I must to lose weight. I don’t even refer to the Intuitive Eating book at all, because my subconscious intention was to not say anything bad about it, but now I don’t feel great about saying nothing about the book either. I honestly only made it about half way through this book - I RARELY don’t finish a book through once I begin. While I think the overall message of the book is well intentioned and there are some good pieces of information there are definitely parts that I found problematic.

I got it and realized it’s about saying no to dieting and hustle culture and, even thought it wasn’t exactly what I was hoping for, I was intrigued. I definitely agreed with a few things. I feel the human body is still a "caveman" body - doing anything possible to survive possible famine. I believe that if you overly restrict intake, your body will eventually binge, because it thinks it's starving.But I still didn’t fully understand how deep it all went for me: culturally and metabolically and emotionally and on and on. And I didn’t see how messed up my relationship was with weight, and how that was actually the core of the whole thing. Add to this two biblical-based weight loss programs, one of which I lost a lot of weight because I was waiting for hunger and eating only until satisfied, and never eating if my stomach didn’t growl. If I ever wanted food outside of physiological hunger, I was to pray to God to fill the void I was looking to food for. It worked for a while until I would want to eat birthday cake at a party but I wasn’t truly hungry. When I didn’t want to be rude, I’d eat it and then feel tremendous guilt and shame. I’d disclose it to people in my group and be further shamed for still living in “my sin.” If I had truly laid my sin down, I wouldn’t have eaten that cake. I love self-help as much as the next girl, but the information can be really tough to apply. I also have a really toxic relationship with diet books (and diets in general) because they are easy —eat this, not that, and you’ve done it. Everything is laid out for me. This perfectly melds the two. Dooner includes exercises and homework throughout the book to help you apply her advice to your lifestyle. She isn’t telling you to stop eating burgers or to eat a salad for lunch every day. She focuses on healing your relationship and emotional attachment to food –which in turn, has had a very positive effect on my body image and how I look at food and eating. I don’t feel compelled to get take-out when I’ve had a bad day because I understand that isn’t what I need to feel good. I also don’t hesitate to go for the office donuts if they look good and my body feels hungry. An ex-yo-yo dieter herself, Dooner knows how terrifying it can be to break free of the vicious cycle, but with her signature sharp humor and compassion, she shows listeners that a sustainable, easy relationship with food is possible.

An ex-yo-yo dieter herself, Dooner knows how terrifying it can be to break free of the vicious cycle, but with her signature sharp humor and compassion, she shows readers that a sustainable, easy relationship with food is possible. Weeks after reading the book, and just a few weeks before I went off to college, my mom told me she had cancer, and we both became raw vegan to try and heal all of our earthly ills (it didn’t work) (my mom is fine, but not because of raw veganism, she ditched it soon after starting chemo) (also, I have complex feelings about pharmaceutical companies too, but raw veganism was still not the answer).(Yes I was a raw vegan in freshman year of college.) I definitely did not agree with the author's "this works for everyone" approach. What I've learned in my 35 year weight battle is that everybody is different and there is no magic bullet for every person. The author was able to reintroduce sugar and eat it intuitively without binging, cravings, etc. That is not my experience with sugar, even when I ate sugar/carbs whenever I wanted them, I always always always wanted more. If I didn't reach some kind of equilibrium in 6 years, when was it going to happen for me? I think the most important step is to learn about the science behind weight and food and health, and basically how we’ve been misled for profit. If you can see how you’ve been continuously told you’re not good enough for profit, that anger and frustration can help motivate you forward. My book goes through the basics, and then for people who want to go even further, the book Body Respect by Linda Bacon and Lucy Aphramor go extensively into the science. You can also read this online journal. The other important thing to do is to start following more diverse bodies on social media. Studies have shown that only seeing very skinny models and actresses in our media has trained our brains to believe that’s the only beautiful and acceptable kind of body to have, and this can actually cause perpetuate feelings of shame, which affects our relationship with food, too. And so what we have to do now is retrain our brains. 8. Anything else you want people reading this to know? Will this work for me, I doubt it as the damage to my body is done. For over 20 years I’ve eaten so little that I don’t know when I’m hungry. What I have done is to try to eat more. Sounds daft but it is hard work trying to force yourself to eat when you don’t want to but if I am to get my body out of the starvation mode that it has been in for many, many years then this is what I need to do.

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Except…this is about a 20-something who has very dramatic medical crises about every other year of her life. She gets plastic surgery in high school because she convinces her parents a new nose will make her happy. She also wants to be an actor. She lives in New York in an apartment her parents pay for. She studies abroad. Being an actor is overwhelming. More medical crises. Her “liver hurts” when she has a sip of alcohol. She tries to be a receptionist for a short while but then that’s exhausting and she declares…a two year rest. I wish I was kidding. I wrote the way I needed to hear it explained. I needed to hear more about our relationship to weight. And I needed to be less afraid of eating lots and lots of food. (And clearly I needed someone screaming at me with curse words.) I’d read the Intuitive Eating book a few years before this and learned about how dieting wires you to feel out of control with food, but when I’d tried it, it didn’t “work” for me. I still felt out of control around food. But what this new realization had made me realized, is that all the time I thought I as intuitive eating, I was not. I was subconsciously micromanaging everything. I was still trying to eat the smallest amount possible, and I was still trying to be as thin as possible. And I wondered… is that why I still feel out of control with food? Because I never actually stopped dieting? First of all, Intuitive Eating is a book written by two registered dietitian nutritionists, Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, that came out in 1995. The book is revolutionary in its genre and field, completely evidence based, and I recommend you read it. Another biblical group has more grace but also rules. No more than a fist-sized portion of food as that’s how big your stomach is after all. Great. What happens though when you eat one bite past the portion? Immense guilt. Guilt which leads to bingeing.