Empress Theresa

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Oh, so very much. Rather than use her powers to save the world, Theresa basically goes on an extended holiday and complains about everything in France. She also misses chipmunks while there. Ships: The USS Ronald Reagan does not carry F-22 Raptors (nor does any other aircraft carrier, there's no naval variant of the Raptor), only F/A-18E Super Hornets. After thinking it over, she decides that South Korea can’t immediately move in to fix up the place, as it would be majorly disruptive. Therefore, she will “have to run the country dictatorially through the North Korean bureaucracy” with the south non-interfering. To do so, and to be respected properly, she must be enlisted as an officer of the US Army. Before all that, she must first get rid of the bigger weapons. Using a ping pong ball in a tube, she can monitor the destruction of weapons. When HAL destroys a weapon she finds, the ping pong ball jumps up to one foot in a glass tube, then falls down again under its own weight. By looking at the average level of the ping pong ball, it can be determined visually how many weapons are being destroyed.

I didn’t have to do research. It was all in my head. Of course I looked up a few facts like the amount of gold in Fort Knox, the tectonic source of Antarctica, and the density of xenon, but 99.9% of the story came out of my memory. [25] Omnipotence [ ] Big Fancy House: The Parker estate where Theresa and Steve temporarily stay at whilst hiding from assassins.

As he usually does in the face of honest criticism, Norman Boutin simply ignored this, and offered no response. The thread fell into a series of self-advertisements from him. This is (purportedly) an adult man attempting to write in the voice of a young girl. It reads like an adult man trying to write in the voice of a young girl. Evidently he thinks ten year old girls speak in short, choppy, awkward, irritating sentences. Nothing about this first person narration rings true. Improvised Weapon: Theresa improvises a flotation device using a bag full of soda bottles. She does this by casually taking a dozen bottles of soda out of a cooler and, in full view of her captors, placing them into a garbage bag. No one suspects anything.

This may be considered an Informed Ability, since in spite of the text insisting that Theresa is in all ways perfect and universally adored, a large number of people constantly want to kill her. Empress Theresa: "I didn't do anything and people want me dead. It's wrong. Why do people do the wrong thing?" asks eighteen year old Theresa on live television before four billion viewers after the President of France says a thouand assassins will be after her. It is one thing to ask people for their opinion (even Norm's done that) - it is quite another to be willing to accept that opinion, or at least take it to heart. Don't ask for someone's advice or opinion and expect nothing but oohs and awes. If someone says "This doesn't work" or "You need to flesh this part out," they're probably right. If a large number of people complain about something, it's probably a bigger concern than you're aware of. Look at your work with humility, and accept the fact that it probably needs to be changed. Angelic Abomination: HAL is a ball of pure white light that is for all intents a stand in for the Holy Spirit... that also happens to be an alien and "not made of matter or energy". Boutin then changed the terms he had set from "creating something" to "creating something of which Norman Boutin would approve":

Conflicting accounts have been given by Norman Boutin about how much time he spent on Empress Theresa. At one point, he claimed to have "spent 19 years writing" the book, [1] while at another time he said it was "over a twenty year period." [2] On Facebook, he said that he began writing it in 1974. [3] Elsewhere, Norman said that eighteen years ago he had "the kernel of an idea" for the book in 1994, [4] but he "actually started writing it" three years ago. [5] This would put the starting year of writing Empress Theresa around 2009. Creepy Child: Theresa spawns 420 of them while the world is in a 600-year coma. They have numbers for names, they're kept in a prepubescent state for centuries, they all look like Theresa and Steve... yeah. Hope Bringer: Somehow manages to be this and The Dreaded considering how often she strikes fear into the hearts of government leaders.

If you don't desire a heavy dose of negative attention, do not give readers and reviewers alike a reason to give you negative attention. Look at Norman and his antics and, beside getting a heavy case of schadenfreude, learn and grow from his mistakes.

Theresa says in Chapter 4 that Psalm 23 is "not a standard church prayer". Almost every church uses Psalm 23 at some point in their services, and it's one of the most recognizable prayers in the entire Christian and Jewish faiths. note It’s “The Lord is my Shepherd,” if you don’t know the chapter numbers. Considering Boutin is a devout Catholic, you'd think he'd know better.

Can't Hold His Liquor: Averted with Steve who manages to down the equivalent of 24 pints at Oktoberfest despite never having drunk alcohol before. Theresa's husband, Steve Hartley. He exists only to be rude to anyone who might offend his precious Theresa. A soldier gives Theresa thermal garments so she doesn't get cold in the plane thousands of feet up in the air even though she's going to be nuked to death anyway. Theresa apparently forgot about her heat-emitting powers at that moment.

Theresa: "My green outfit was modest, only five inches above the knees and with not much cleavage, but didn't hide my well-turned figure. All right, my chest and butt were well outlined." While Blair talks about how they all thought Theresa was dead and how they were planning her funeral, he relates that they were to play a soulful instrumental version of Danny Boy "for the girl descended from the Irish" and that "Great Britain was proud to bring one of its own home for a final visit." Ireland is not a part of Great Britain or the United Kingdom. While Northern Ireland is a part of the UK, it isn't specified what part of Ireland Theresa's ancestry comes from. Not to mention that Theresa is an American-born and raised citizen and therefore has nothing to do with either country in the first place.