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Over time, the infant tends to become needy and angry, a ‘clingy', but distrustful and resistant child. Initially the infant may simply make demands almost constantly to attract and keep the attention of the caregiver or may become rather helpless in the absence of a predictably successful strategy. Attachment behaviours may attract the caregiver's attention in a positive way, for example, cooing, smiling and reaching out.

Therapist should be able to catch signs of distrust and evasion — avoidance patients has a tendency to be emotionally self-contained and insulated against intimate contact with other people, even when they start therapy they keep the therapist at a distance — and will talk about anything BUT emotionally charged relationships (past or present), or say that they have nothing to talk about (i. Actually, there was one thing which I felt was important not from a psychiatric POV but just in general was that the emotional development is so under-valued (this was written a while ago so predates its own impact on the field where this as an important area. Giving time and attention to children means sacrificing other interests and activities, but for many people today these are unwelcome truths. What I find interesting is that as well as looking at the cases where psychoanalysis may be used as a means to healing, the influence that our parents and other family members and associates have on our lives will most certainly have an impact on the course of our psychological development and it follows that the early years are crucial as we are most vulnerable and malleable at this time. As Bowlby himself points out in his introduction to this seminal childcare book, to be a successful parent means a lot of very hard work.During the earliest years of our lives, indeed, emotional expression and its reception are the only means of communication we have. This is, perhaps, one of the most important theories for the understanding of human nature and behavioral patterns. Below, each of these four patterns is described in relation to the caregiving approach associated with it. This process begins with the child's needs and behaviour and then focuses on what is going on in the mind of the caregiver. But it also considers how those relationships can enable the child to develop competence in the outside world of school, peer group and community.

There are, in fact, no more important communications between one human being and another than those expressed emotionally. Caregivers, of course, respond to the needs and demands of their children in different ways and this gives rise to different attachment patterns.The text cited above also gives an idea of how the author draws from ideas and results from ethology (especially Konrad Lorenz studies). As the baby grows, the mind minded caregiver also finds it natural to talk to the baby about their own feelings and behaviour (‘Mummy's tired now, so we'll stop the game and have a drink') and that of others (‘Your friend felt sad when you wouldn't share the toy, that's why she went off into the other room').