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Do Hard Things: Why We Get Resilience Wrong and the Surprising Science of Real Toughness

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This book has totally changed the way I think. I recommend it to any and every teen who has a desire to turn their life around and make a difference." The ideas presented will move you away from “tough it out” and into tuning into your body and mind to make the hard decisions.

From beloved performance expert, executive coach, and coauthor of Peak Performance Steve Magness comes a radical rethinking of how we perceive toughness and what it means to achieve our high ambitions in the face of hard things. A calm conversation, on the other hand, makes room for a more thoughtful response. It might sound something like this: Oh no, this hurts. That’s OK – that’s normal. Stay loose. Keep breathing. You’ve got this. Smart and wise all at once, Magness flips the script on what it means to be resilient. Drawing from mindfulness, military case studies, sports psychology, neuroscience, psychology, and philosophy, he provides a roadmap for navigating life’s challenges and achieving high performance that makes us happier, more successful, and, ultimately, better people. Four key behaviors form the foundation of real resilience. Each of the next chapters will guide you through one of these behaviors. Let’s start with the first behavior. Toughness isn’t about projecting confidence; it’s about uncovering authenticity. In other words, to be tough, you need to ditch the facade. I’m not exactly a teenager anymore. But as I was reading I began to see how this can apply to anyone. It’s never too late to start. I absolutely cannot wait to suggest this book to the ‘kidults’ in my life.”Use the brain dump to build momentum and remind yourself that you are smarter than you think you are. Plus, the advice Dolly would give to Glennon and Abby’s daughter, Tish, as she enters the music business.

Do Hard Things is an extraordinary book. In fact, I believe it will prove to be one of the most life-changing, family-changing, church-changing, and culture-changing books of this generation. I'd love for every teenager to read this book, but I'm just as eager for every parent, church leader, and educator to read it." Adam Alter, Professor of Marketing and Psychology, New York University Stern School of Business, New York Times Bestselling Author of IRRESISTIBLE and DRUNK TANK PINK How there are MANY reasons people have sex. (Glennon says sexual attraction only accounts for 5% of her sexual experiences.); and Good Morning America Adele insists Glennon Doyle's book 'Untamed' changed her outlook on life ahead of body transformation Reassure: Experienced meditators are so good at calming themselves down after a stressful experience because they’ve spent thousands of hours observing thoughts and emotions come and go and understand that everything is temporary. We need not meditate for thousands of hours to know that discomfort is a fleeting sensation that rises and falls. If we use discomfort as a cue to tell ourselves, “This too shall pass,” we can return to a state of equanimity.Here is a three-part method to reliably return your amygdala to baseline and maintain a state of equanimity (evenness and composure in stressful situations): The best critique I've come across of why "self-esteem culture"/empty praise doesn't produce results. Do Hard Things is the textbook for anyone who works with teens; it’s a philosophical and foundational must-read.” This book is amazing. It changes your whole way of thinking. I believe that every single teen needs to buy a copy of this book. Thanks, Alex and Brett for challenging us!"

Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of THINK AGAIN and host of the TED podcast WorkLifeIn DO HARD THINGS, Steve Magness dismantles the widely endorsed but damaging suggestion that toughness is about bulldozing your way through difficult situations. Magness' version of toughness—"real toughness"—is more nuanced, forgiving, flexible, and learnable. Real toughness means processing stressors thoughtfully, deliberately, and with vulnerability, rather than superficially and rigidly. DO HARD THINGS changed how I think about stoicism and strength, both on the sports field and more broadly, and I can't recommend it highly enough"

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