Get Divorced, Be Happy: How becoming single turned out to be my happily ever after

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Everyone kept telling me to stay married because of the baby, but my opinion is that it’s much better for a child to live with divorced parents who are happier on their own than to live with married parents who are constantly arguing and not happy with their lives. Jasmine My advice to others is don’t be afraid, there are people out there if you’re scared or if you need help, and I know love is a strong feeling but you need to live the life you want, not feel suffocated and unhappy. Jasmine Instead, the new law will simply introduce the requirement to provide a statement of irretrievable breakdown. Joint applications will become possible (although applicants can still submit a sole application if their partner does not agree to the Divorce). I still feel bad for the hurt I caused, and I have, on occasion, missed his kindness, but I remain convinced that our marriage would have grown biter and miserable. I was nervous to tell them at first I thought they would all say I failed, but once I told them they were fully supportive and were surprised it took so long, as they could see the problems before me. But obviously, no one could tell me that, I had to figure it out myself.

Reasons Women are Happier After Divorce - LiveAbout 9 Reasons Women are Happier After Divorce - LiveAbout

My ex is in a longstanding relationship with a woman who is much more like him now. Everyone in my family says she’s wonderful and they’re happy, which confirms that I made the right choice. ‘Don’t underestimate how difficult divorce will be’ The most difficult part was getting him to agree on that because in their culture it’s a great shame for a man if his wife decides to leave him,but I knew what I wanted and I wasn’t afraid anymore. To trust your gut and do what is right for you. You can’t live your life being unhappy just to please everyone else around you. At the same time, I know some people choose to work on relationships and they happily stay together. For me, I now know this was what was right for me. Helen’s divorced due to infidelity, and she explains how she had a new lease on life when she started again. She wakes up every morning loving how she looks and feels. “Harnessing life and starting over again was a blessing”, she said. Helen had a sense of lightness, choosing her path every morning. She wishes everyone, regardless of their relationship status, had that energising feeling of self-worth. The new law removes the need to ‘blame’ one party and will encourage a more constructive approach to separation, promoting reconciliation and reflection where possible but ultimately trusting the judgment of the couple involved.Yes, before I found out about him cheating, I did everything in my power to avoid divorce (which I why I stayed for so many months.) I couldn’t let a marriage end after 1 year! What would my friends and family think, they’d be so confused and disappointed! I often heard the saying, “if he wanted to, he would.” I never realized what this truly meant, and now I do. Chloe If you have tried therapy and worked on the relationship with commitment and are still unhappy, you probably won’t regret your decision to divorce. Getting therapy before deciding to divorce can help achieve more positive outcomes if you do decide to divorce. And no, you are not a quitter. With the help of relationship experts and an army of women "who know", Get Divorced, Be Happy will show you that going it alone isn't the end, it is just the beginning, and you will come out the other side, stronger, happier and goddamn sassier than ever before. Lots of things resulted in it but the moment I realised it was over was when we moved into our house and he kept accusing me of having affairs, phoning me when I was at work events and ruining the nights with it, then there was the fact he didn’t want to come with me to see family or be bothered with them.

Get Divorced, Be Happy: How Becoming Single Turned Out to Be

But in Get Divorced Be Happy, Helen Thorn makes the argument for enjoying every aspect of single motherhood. There’s no one else to answer to, no one to consider aside from the kids and suddenly plenty of free time again. Time to reconnect with old friends, meet new ones, and consider your own needs. The fact we weren’t right for each other didn’t emerge straight away because we had a long-distance courtship and marriage, but the more time we spent in the same city the less we had to talk about. He was a kind, supportive man but not an observant or reflective one. I knew I would grow impatient with him, so I left. (Yes, I gave another explanation.) Happiness is subjective and not easy to measure, varying over time. Some research shows that happiness increases over time. The catalyst that led to the divorce was when we had the baby and I went through all of this on my own, with zero support from him. Jasmine My story is I met my ex-husband when I was 18, he was my sister’s boyfriend’s dad, and I liked the attention I was getting, plus I like older men and he was double my age. He was good to me and I soon moved in with him, next thing I know we are getting married the year I turned 20. Everything was great until we lost our jobs, I managed to find one but he couldn’t and got depressed. He got offered a job in his home county, so at the age of 23 I moved for him to be able to work, I left all my friends and family behind for a fresh start. I worked in a few jobs and did crazy hours and we lived in a house share until we found a house to rent, then I got a full-time job, which I loved.Like a best mate in a book to guide you through hell – and out the other side via belly laughs, firefighters and finding joy in a new way of living” ― Helen Russell. It made me stronger and more confident in myself knowing what I want and not letting someone control my life and the life I wanted. Bella

Book review: Get Divorced Be Happy - Cappuccino Counselling Book review: Get Divorced Be Happy - Cappuccino Counselling

Telling other people was easy and relieving. Actually chatting and discussing this with others gave me strength to go through with it, I was never afraid of what others might think of it. I will never regret it as I wouldn’t be me without that experience and I wouldn’t have my job now, be with the man I love, or have the friends and family without them. But I do regret parts of it and for letting myself stay in a situation that changed me for the bad. Let's talk about Sex! Get ready for an engaging and eye-opening episode of Women Who Rebrand! Sareta is joined by the incredible Bima Loxley, a Clinical Sexologist who specialises in helping individuals, couples, and multiple-partnered relationships. Together, they... read more Breaking the Narcissistic Mother Cycle for Future Generations E47 I was married to someone I wasn’t even sure I wanted to be with. But there I was and a year later I ended up pregnant. Again, I definitely wasn’t ready for this, not at all. But it was mental pressure from him and his family to have children. I was too afraid to say no again. We ended up having a beautiful baby boy who was born prematurely at 30 weeks, 2.5 months before his due date. It was very difficult seeing your 1.4kg baby in the hospital inside the incubator connected to all these wires but we got through it and we have a healthy, 2-year-old, beautiful and clever boy. How did you find telling other people about your decision, did you ever feel pressure to stay through fear of other people’s opinions?Welcome to episode 47 of Women Who Rebrand! Join Sareta and her special guest, Harriet Shearsmith, Author, Blogger and Podcaster, as they delve into narcissistic mother and adult-daughter dynamics.Harriet knows the challenges of navigating estrangement, toxic family... read more Breaking Free from Codependency: Understanding Attachment Styles E45 It felt like someone was repeatedly slapping me across the face with the reality that I hadn’t been good enough for him, and that I was worthless enough to be cheated on. Chloe Please read the signs as soon as possible, and literally speak to anyone about it. Your family, friends, therapist, or even your colleagues. I thought I could do it on my own, and I let myself wallow in self-pity and disdain, and I let my abuser take over. I’d been completely blindsided, and had lost all hope. When I did finally tell someone, it was like a wave of relief came washing over me, and I finally felt all my emotional bondage being cut off – I was free, and I was safe. I’d also want people in this situation to know that even though it will be hard, you will come out the other side and be happy again. Alicia Chloe

Get Divorced, Be Happy - Penguin Books UK Get Divorced, Be Happy - Penguin Books UK

There will be no minimum period of separation required if, at present, the parties seek to avoid attributing blame. From 6th April 2022, separating couples no longer had to rely on one of the ‘five facts’ to prove the ground for Divorce. The Five FactsMy ex and I are still in love, but he is unhappily remarried now with a new family and he doesn’t want to leave his kids. We see each other occasionally for lunch, but these meetings don’t go further than us declaring our love for each other. By the time I realised I’d made a terrible mistake (about six months later) my ex-husband had already met the woman who would become his second wife. At the age of 23 I moved for him to be able to work, I left all my friends and family behind for a fresh start. Bella