The Gifts Of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

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On the other hand, I want to be who I am and stop striving to follow what other people say I am or should be. So, what is in The Gifts of Imperfection is really important to me. Brown says that owning our story is easier than running from it. I am still not sure I believe her. I recommend this book to those who are looking for a way to embrace where they are; to readers of self-help books for I think this is one of the best and I would like to figure out how to recommend this to some people at work. The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed To Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brene Brown -- Your Guide To A Wholehearted Life

Our stories are not meant for everyone. Hearing them is a privilege, and we should always ask ourselves this before we share: “Who has earned the right to hear my story?” Ten Guideposts for Wholehearted Living: (highly recommend the book to learn more about each guide posts in depth.) And it dawned on me that maybe we all feel like this to an extent. And yet, I watch others and I am sure, absolutely sure, that they know something about living that I don't. And maybe they do...maybe they've figured out the secret that it's okay to be imperfect. But maybe they haven't. To love someone fiercely, to believe in something with your whole heart, to celebrate a fleeting moment in time, to fully engage in a life that doesn’t come with guarantees – these are risks that involve vulnerability and often pain. But, I’m learning that recognizing and leaning into the discomfort of vulnerability teaches us how to live with joy, gratitude and grace.” Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them – we can only love others as much as we love ourselves.Overall... This book wasn't awful...( of course not), yet... I didn't feel moved or inspired or transformed. 'Maybe'.... A little more validated on the ways I already live my life...(so this is not a bad thing). After years of studying, researching, and writing about vulnerability, shame, and fear, Brown noticed a pattern among the people who were living a “wholehearted” life through processing thousands of stories collected. After analyzing the data, realization that she wasn’t living a wholehearted life herself, Brown decided to do further research and create a guidebook to help people pursue the wholehearted life. Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to each other by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and compassion. Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning and purpose to our lives.” It's probably one of the most self aggrandizing and vapid pop psychology books I 've ever read. There's really nothing here that you won't find in other books of the genre much better expressed and explained, a lot of times from the actual originators of these ideas that she takes credit for here with her phantom research. She does a mess with them btw, mixing concepts up and treating everything superficially. Also, I guess I'd like to hear the thoughts you have to fight to, say, dance with your kid in the kitchen, which I guess to me is comically bragging about a perfect family. Because I'm interested in what she has to conquer to do those things, and in the beginning I think it is clear what she's fighting.

So I'm just going to be honest and vulnerable with you all. I have issues with not being good enough, being vulnerable, and not being worthy because I'm not what society says I should be. However, with this book, which reads more like an epiphany than a self help book, I'm coming to realize that no one is perfect, and you know what? That's ok. Through the research, Brown found ten common factors among the people who were living a “wholehearted” life (listed below). Each guidepost has a dig deep section. According to Brown, “dig-deep button is a secret level of pushing through when we’re exhausted and overwhelmed, and when there’s too much to do and too little time for self-care.” Brown found that the Wholehearted people dig deep differently – they get deliberate, inspired, and going. Brown does great job of explaining concepts, ideas, and research process, it all makes sense to me. What I really appreciate about the way she presents her work is it’s easy to grasp, understand, and applicable to real life. She’s also a great storyteller, combing research with her personal stories with honesty, candor, and warmth. She doesn’t just tell you what to do, but rather connect with you. I get that not everyone may like her approach, research, and work, but there’s so much to learn from her, and I find what she’s doing incredible important. And just bringing awareness and shining light on the difficult topics, we can start to have conversation, open up, and let go of some of the heavy burden of hiding ourselves. This book is a great start, and I hope she continues to do important researches and write books to help many people. I highly recommend this book. I believe there's something beneficial for everyone.

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Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead (2012) Like this: "Get Inspired...I'm inspired by this quote from writer and researcher Elisabeth Kubler-Ross: 'People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their beauty is revealed only if here is a light from within.' I really do believe the light that I saw within the resilient people I interviewed was their spirit. I love the idea of being 'lit from within'." When looking for the attributes associated with masculinity, the researchers identified these as important attributes for men: emotional control, primacy of work, control over women, and pursuit of status. That means if men want to play it safe, they need to stop feeling, start earning, and give up on meaningful connection. We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection.