Swifty: The Super-fast Parrot

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Every last one of you is a wimp," said Tom xerophytically. (Pronounce "xerophytically" with first "y" long.)

All these years prospecting, and all I have to show for it is the deed to this hole in the ground under my outhouse that otherwise ain't worth nuthin'," said Tom single mine diddly squat. The number of people not attending class today really bothers me," said the professor absent-mindedly. It has zero height, zero width, and -- well, maybe I'll allow it to have a bit of depth," said Tom, stretching the point. D Entries 1. "That hydroelectric facility is so beautiful I think I'll pass out!" said Tom, fainting with dam praise.According to this sonograph, the average frequency of my speaking voice is 160 Hz," said Tom in measured tones. We had trouble with the propulsion systems for those moon flights," said the NASA engineer apologetically. Eating uranium can cause atomic ache," said Tom with a high-pitched voice. (Uranium is found in pitchblende, for those of you who find the antecedent a little obscure.)

Swifty confirms that its acquisition of Goldchip Limited is being funded partly in Cash, Restricted Shares and Vendor Finance. Swifty Global recently received its United Kingdom (UK) and Curacao gambling licenses and has been in final preparations for the launch of its Unique Sports Predictions app in the UK. The launch will take place once Swifty receives its GLI certificate, which certifies that its software meets UK and International Gambling standards. The company expects to receive this certification in the coming weeks. Once Swifty launches its sports predictions app in the UK, it will continue its roll out globally as the relevant licenses are obtained in each country or region/state. I've already given you the nominative, vocative, accusative, genitive, dative, and ablative, so I will say no more," Tom declined. I know you won't take my advice, Mr Van Gogh, but after cutting your ear off, I think you should go to jail," said Tom unconvincingly; "-- or perhaps sign yourself in to a home," he added noncommittally.

B Entries

But a totalitarian government could remove all trace of my ever having existed!" said Tom unpersonably. Mr. and Mrs. Roy Bongartz developed Croakers, a variant of Tom Swifties in which a verb rather than an adverb provides the pun:

I'm doing a syntactic analysis of low, long-drawn sounds indicating discomfort," said Tom parsimoniously. Since in this statement 'Y = COSH(X)', X is invariant, let's pre-compute Y before we enter the loop," said Tom precociously. In addition to this exciting acquisition which should add substantial value for Swifty’s Shareholders, the company is progressing well with its EMI banking license strategy. This will enable the issuing of Virtual banking cards from the Swifty Wallet when Swifty’s larger integrated Fintech solution materialises in the medium to long-term. Given that Swifty is planning an aggressive expansion into the Fintech arena, the company is exploring several complimentary Fintech acquisition opportunities, which it plans to complete after the launch of its sports predictions app. Artie is a convicted felon, a decorated Veteran of WWII, a legitimate businessman, and a father. As he struggles to guide his son Jake and make up for what he did to Swifty, he learns more about himself. As usual, with these gents, it is mile-a-minute fun and games with a twist around every corner. Imagine how a couple of senior citizens who still think they are thirty deal with the aches and pains of age while they measure up to the challenges of today.

There's no hope we'll get any dope when the captain looks up the periscope," said Tom subversively.