The Soul of Discipline: The Simplicity Parenting Approach to Warm, Firm, and Calm Guidance—from Toddlers to Teens

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In 1911, teachers gave children a card to take home in which they were tasked with assignments such as baking pies, sweeping floors, and washing dishes. Homework was literally work to be done in and around the home” (232). That sounds great! Spirituality without discipline moves in hapless fits and starts; it is sporadic, dependent on fluctuating feelings and external circumstances. It requires little to no effort, but also produces little to no sustained growth, and thus little to no fruit. If there’s something that stirs inside whenever you hear words like solitude, silence, simplicity, the spiritual disciplines are for you. The Soul of Discipline offers practical tools for helping parents implement discipline that's respectful and effective, but the book is so much more. Kim John Payne offers a framework to guide parents in making decisions about why, when, and how to hold tighter reins as we build skills in our children, and why, when, and how to loosen the reins as we scaffold freedom." --Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D., co-author of No-Drama Discipline The Gardener, who watches for emotional growth and makes decisions based on careful listening, assisting tweens in making plans that take the whole family’s needs into account

Payne gives parents heartwarming help and encouragement by combining astute observations with sensitive and often funny stories from his long career as a parent educator and a school and family counselor. In accessible language, he explains the relevance of current brain- and child-development studies to day-to-day parenting. Breaking the continuum of childhood into three stages, Payne says that parents need to play three different roles, each corresponding to one of those stages, to help steer children through their emotional growth and inevitable challenging times: The way we perceive and approach misbehavior is the key to diffusing our children’s difficult and even explosive conduct. A critical shift in our approach to parenting takes place when we begin to understand that there is no such thing as a disobedient child, only a disoriented one.Great organizations are ones that exude and enforce standards and discipline much better than average organizations. The term “standard” is defined by the American Standard Dictionary as a written definition, limit, or rule, approved and monitored for compliance by an authoritative agency or professional or recognized body as minimum acceptable benchmark. Standards may be classified as (1) government or statutory agency standards and specifications enforced by law, (2) proprietary standards developed by a firm or organization and placed in public domain to encourage their widespread use, (3) voluntary standards established by consultation and consensus and available for use by any person, organization, or industry.

There were many places where they'd say things like, 'Just remember these 5 points. . . ' but when they elaborated on the points, each one had 6 exceptions, so there were really 30 things to remember. The book is also very copy-dense - again, I think the methods are sound - but it's a lot to get through. It probably says something about my parenting style that I need pictures and snappy anecdotes to break up the theory:)Knowledge must grow or perish; and it can grow only in a free mind, that is to say a mind which is sufficiently strong to create its own discipline. The Guide, who is both a sounding board and moral compass for emerging adults, helping teens build a sense of their life’s direction as a way to influence healthy decision making The alternative to these situations is that the child does what he or she is told, simply because he or she is told to do so. It is the parent’s job to be the authority; it is the child’s job to comply. We give instructions, not requests. We don’t justify our instructions. We don’t plead for cooperation. We issue instructions and expect compliance. As an introduction to this short article, it is important to mention up front that compiling letters from senior leaders in the field who are out doing the Nation's business (leading and taking care of young Soldiers and their Families) is an extremely worthwhile endeavor. In addition to applauding this effort, it is important to note that speaking on many of these topics is extraordinarily necessary based on the strength and health of today’s Army.