Where Did I Go Wrong

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As for the content of the book, I judge it to be inauthentic. Fake. The sincerity that Dahmer entreats the reader to believe in is flashy and almost non-existent. He went on to establish the government’s first climate science program and brief three prime ministers (Hawke, Keating and Howard) on climate change. Later, after an acrimonious parting with the CSIRO, he would travel from community groups to fossil fuel company board rooms giving presentations on climate change. Lionel splashes around in his personal failure as a husband, a father, a citizen, whatever. But none of it is worse than my own family. He tries out the blame shoe on everybody and everything—media, drugs, Mom, school, genetics, and mostly himself. His writing isn’t captivating, it is sentimental and emotionless at the same time, often forgivably hokey, but I couldn’t put it down. Is he lying about anything? I just don’t know, can’t know. Where Did We Go Wrong? is full of drama…crazy drama. Just when you think that the story couldn’t get any more drama-filled, another situation presents itself which compliments the plot perfectly.

This book gave me no understanding of Jeffrey Dahmer, he is just evil. I believe Satan is the Father of Lies, and Jeffrey and his family seem his disciples, in my opinion. My 35 yr old daughter, met, got married and move to a new state with her husband & my Grandaughter in less than 1 yr. She gave up the stability of family living near by and state assistance. She was a single mom for 9 yrs and doing all the right things to get off state assistance. Where Did We Go Wrong? by Monica Mathis-Stowe was the 2013 June BOTM Selection for the KC Girlfriends Book Club. I am so relieved I found this comment section, after hours of laying in bed worrying about my 19 year old college student who lives in a dorm and recently tells me casually she is snorting opiates. “Like no big deal mom”. I am riddled with angst, ruminating thoughts and fear that drives me. I am also professional in the behavioral health world and have some fairly well for myself so it is Incredibly scary to know the potential road she is ahead. I went through a horrible divorce with her father 4 years ago. Though we did not get along her life was fairly stable yet, she shoves all of her anger rage and life hatred towards me. Everything is my fault. She is many ways took on the verbal and emotional manipulation of her father and I can not tolerate that. I’m currently on a “break” right now from yet it has caused me to think of the most extreme consequences happening to her. Even if your child is an adult, he or she does not have the right to be abusive to you or anyone else.NOTE- TO PEOPLE WHO HAVE GIVEN THEIR THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS ON THIS BOOK, I'D POLITELY REQUEST YOU TO STOP, BECAUSE THIS IS NOT FICTION. NOT A FAIRYTALE WHICH CAN BE CHANGED BY CHANGING CHARACTERS. IT HAPPENED. ITS A FACT. ACCEPT IT. Lionel Dahmer's memoir about fatherhood and Jeffrey's childhood has helped me a lot to understand myself, my childhood, and my personality better once again. I know that it may sound odd, or creepy to say that one can relate to a person like Jeffrey Dahmer. It is very hard for most people to understand why would someone relate to such a personality, but we're all different in the end.

They are 21 and 15. My oldest drives me insane. He is ADHD, refuses to do anything but half way clean the kitchen and the rest of the time he wants to play video games and watch TV.A final chapter, added after Jeffrey's death in prison, simply adds a film of utter loathing to the reading experience, as father somehow contrives to tie in a possible redemption for his son with an incoherent, self-serving diatribe about the righteousness of intelligent design. I have a 19 year old daughter who has a learning disability. She never went through that preteen or early teen age stage where she was rude and uncontrollable. She feeds off suggestions and will seek suggestions from others. It use to be me and More my family but she met a 21 at the time but was really 23 boy who is the worse possible person any girl should date. His mom is rude and disrespectful. His oldest brother is serving a life long sentence. The boyfriend has been doing drugs since high school and I'm not sure how but this boys younger sister has passed. According to my daughters boyfriend mother I should be happy that my daughter is dating this college drop out drug addict who is 23 and stills live home with mommy and not to mention within the past year he has had 7 jobs. My daughter wanted to be an RN but she first had to finish high school. I had to pull her out and homeschool because she went from straight A's to straight F's. She was doing so good until she met this boy. She rather work in a factory. She's lying and doing drugs. She is now rude and disrespectful. She tells her 13 year old sister things that are not appropriate. This all happened over night. No warning at all. Now everything I saw is wrong but yet she will listen to trashy people. The boy told her that she was to fat. She's 5'9 and was weighing 165. Curves in places women died for. Now she's she skinny she flat all over. They are planning her life and she allows it. When do I stop trying to help. They are brainwashing her. When holding conversation with her anyone can tell that she's not mentally 19 but maybe 15 or 16. I even financially cut her off. It's painful to watch her hot glue her shoes together or to have to patch up holes in her clothes yet she rather stay with this boy. They all seem to have ADHD in common. Those with kids who are not, have perhaps not been diagnosed yet? It is part of the human condition to care about other species, he says. But at the same time “it is us as humans that have created this way of looking at the world – created the importance of wealth generation compared with other values that we might have”. When I began reading Monica Mathis-Stowe’s Where Did We Go Wrong?, I wasn’t sure where the story was going to go. Silently, I was hoping that this wouldn’t be another drama filled Street Lit book filled with self-absorbed women and drug dealers that took no prisoners and lived the high life. I was pleasantly surprised.

I can hear how much you want to help your son launch successfully into adulthood. The best way to help with that is by giving him clear limits and boundaries and allowing him the space to figure things out on his own (with a bit of guidance from you). Well, I was feeling badly that my daughter (18) is sabotaging her last semester of high school and that instead of going a excellent university (in another city) she is choosing a mediocre one because she can stay home. We have saved up enough money for her to any school and stay in res. and get a meal plan. I guess she is not ready to leave the nest. But I feel she is avoiding being an adult. She has never had a boyfriend (or girlfriend which ever I don't care) she has never had a job (although I have encouraged her to get one) because she has no money she doesn't go out unless I pay for her evening - which i hesitate to do, so she just sits at home.When I found out my husband was doing drugs (and he would not get help, go to rehab or marriage counseling, or try to stop) I filed for divorce. So the day before her 18th birthday she decided she was leaving. She made arrangements to live with a friend from school and her parents. It absolutely killed me. Well that lasted a couple months and while gone she met a guy and decided to get married after knowing him fo 6 weeks. He was the same age as her. They weren't going to live together til after graduating. She called us and asked to come home and we let her. She'd be leaving for school shortly anyway. But I can honestly say that it was not until my mid to late 30’s before I actually developed general concern for others in the world ( other than my kids and family). I always had sympathy when I heard sad stories and they would make me sad or cry. But, compassion was not there. Concern for others to do well even if they were not struggling. Dahmer, Lionel (1994). A Father's Story. Internet Archive. New York: W. Morrow & Co. p.16. ISBN 978-0-688-12156-3.

My son is 24 and has been living with his mother in another state. He finished school in 2022, more than a year ago, but has yet to start seeking a career, or even a job. He has struggled with ADD, ADHD, and various behavioral issues most of his life. he attended a special college for those conditions, but now feels that his degree is worthless. His mood ranges from sad and lonely to downright exuberant, at least until I ask him how his job search is going. In me, of course, an early obsession with fire had led to nothing more unusual than chemistry, to a life-long work in scientific research. Jeff's momentary fascination with bones might just as easily have pointed to an early interest that might have led eventually to medicine or medical research. It might have led to orthopedics or anatomical drawing or sculpture. It might simply have led to taxidermy. Or, more likely, it might have pointed to absolutely nothing, and been forgotten. Here we are, over 20 years later, with 2 suicide attempts, mental illness and one who is transgender and is choosing life altering surgery. Lionel, however, isn't happy with the "perfect storm" scenario, which is admittedly vague and non-specific. After all, this is his son, his offspring, his responsibility. It was he, Lionel Dahmer, who unleashed Jeffrey on this world. He needs answers. Real answers. Ultimately, he feels guilty and he needs to know if he is somehow to blame. When he was four, and pointed to his belly button and asked what would happen if someone cut it out, was that merely an ordinary question from a child who had begun to explore his own body, or was it a sign of something morbid already growing in his mind? When, at six, Jeff broke several windows out in an old, abandoned building, was that only a typical boyhood prank, or was it the early signal of a dark and impulsive destructiveness? When we went fishing, and he seemed captivated by the gutted fish, staring intently at the brightly colored entrails, was that a child'sBecause even after he gained custody, my son still didn’t want to see me because I cried when I saw them. Much of the most monstrous details of Dahmer’s actions were unknown to me. When he stood trial in the early 1990’s I was fairly young, and I remember equating him with Poe’s “Tell-Tale Heart”… in that, a murdered body was carefully dismembered and hidden away in a home. I vaguely knew that the whole affair was wrapped up in sexuality somehow, but remember mostly the mechanics of its concealment—notably, Dahmer’s freezer, ultimately impounded by police, as seen on television. This book only provides occasional and cursory gruesome details, and understandably so. I looked elsewhere and found calculated necrophilia, human taxidermy, trepanation, and cannibalism—all ultimately at the rate of one murder per week. Her novels describe the drama in relationships among families, lovers, friends, and colleagues. She likes to take her readers on a roller-coaster ride of emotions that will make them laugh, cry, gasp, think, and question people and their actions. Now they are ages 28, 24 and 20 - they have broken my heart, totally embarrassed me and at this point seems like they hate / despise me. Prostitution, Prison, Drugs, Abusive Relationship, Homelessness, Borrowing money, Stealing - are all apart of their lives making their bad choices my problems to bear. Monica Mathis-Stowe really outdid herself with “Where Did We Go Wrong?.” This read is very unpredictable as it leaves you wondering, waiting and wanting to find out what happens next in the sequel you see coming a mile away. As you read, you see the methodical approach Monica took to write this book. She delivers a story that keeps you immersed in a world of drama and suspense.