The Unexpected Joy of Being Single: Locating unattached happiness

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Many people are under the impression that being single is some unfortunate thing that happens to us, but what if it’s a conscious choice we make? This memoir from a 40-year old single woman will resonate with people of all ages. This is the perfect read for independent women who love their own lives and don’t feel the overwhelming need to couple up.

Ever loved someone so much, you would do anything for them? Yeah, well, make that someone yourself and do whatever the hell you want.’ – HARVEY SPECTER, SUITS” When she's not writing, Catherine can generally be found taking twenty (identical) pictures of the sunset, wondering why she's always the sweatiest person in yoga, fighting her 'spend it all!' financial urges, or scanning the body language of strangers to see if it's OK to pet their dog. Social conditioning around being single where the media, culture and society still portray singledom as a sad existence. Society needs to catch up with the growing number of singletons and take the pressure off! I really enjoyed Catherine Gray's writing style in The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober, so I read this. I’m not single, but I could be at any given time (as could we all) and there's good stuff in here about how bizarre our fixation on coupling up and reproducing are as well as how destructive these societal pressures can be for those who choose or have remained single.Being single for an extended period - or for life - can be incredibly empowering, fun and emancipating.

I also laughed about the part where she talks about a boyfriend who told her about the most beautiful girl he'd ever been with. Makes me wonder whether we dated the same guy! I can't believe there's more than one loser in the world who thinks it's a good idea to tell his girlfriend that some previous girlfriend was the most beautiful girl he'd ever been with. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU MEN?!??! This book is a reminder that life can be pretty shit, but it can also be pretty great as well if we’re willing to look at things differently. If you’ve felt like your life is complete chaos (particularly after a break-up), then this book is an excellent reminder that everyone has uphill battles to face. Sometimes it helps to know you’re not going through it alone, and as cheesy as it sounds — things will get better.we’re held up by the scaffolding of the stories we tell ourselves. Without that scaffolding, we feel insecure, wobbly, like we’re a building that’s about to rumble to the ground.” Sophie Tanner embraces ‘sologamy’, the act of marrying oneself. Photograph: Image provided by Sophie Tanner The heart of The Unexpected Joy of Being Single is Gray’s story of how she got from being a love addict and romantic cliché to feeling proud of her single life and confident that hers will be a happy life no matter how long her singlehood lasts.

Finally, during the interview, Catherine mentions how feeling overwhelmed and having ‘single sorrow days’ are normal and okay. Despite writing the book, admittedly she still has days like this, where her candour is to be admired. With humour, The Unexpected Joy of Being Single sets out to help us be happier and content, as singles; but reassuring in reminding us we’re also, still human after all. People can't wind you up if you don't give them the key!" (quote from the mother of Catherine Grey in this book)Gray’s book isn’t a condemnation of relationships so much as an exploration of her own ‘love addiction’ and the research behind why you should work on being as happy solo as you imagine you would be with someone else. Which is hella valid and worth exploring even if you’re coupled up. Over half of Brits aged 25-44 are now single. It's become the norm to remain solo until much later in life, given the average marriage ages of 35 (women) and 38 (men). Many of us are choosing never to marry at all. South Korean universities are now running ‘Marriage and Family’ courses in which it’s mandatory for students to date three classmates, for a whole month, each. (It’s unclear whether they get to choose who they date for four weeks.)” Single in your late twenties or, hold the phone, in your thirties or beyond? Oh hi! You're in the right place. From hearing Catherine speak, we can tell this has been a deep exploration of how it feels to be single while drawing on meaningful research to understand those feelings. With more people than ever before living a single life, the book provides helpful tools to show those of us who may benefit, how we can positively change our mindset and embrace our single status long term. It’s about us all accepting singledom as a normal way of life.

It's well-written, witty, honest, and an excellent book to dip in and out of. Funnily enough since my last review in 2019, and partly due to reading her book, I've really changed my perspective on being single and really do enjoy living a single life.

at some point, we all have to learn how to walk into a party or a restaurant alone. Otherwise, we will be willing to walk in with ANYBODY (or worse, walk out with anybody).” Even though this book is supposed to be for all genders, it is most definitely written with straight, white women in mind, which makes sense because it is written by a straight, white woman. This is not a criticism of the book, just a word of caution that it will not apply to everyone's experience. There is a lot more to being single and dating to what is discussed here. Catherine Gray quotes from Alain de Bouton: "Only once singlehood has completely equal prestige with its alternative (coupledom), can we be sure that people can be free in their choices."