Sneaky Poo

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Breaking the stool withholding cycle needs a two pronged approach - sort the physical first and then you can work on the behavioural side effects of being scared to poo. Be active in as many ways as possible; for example, through play, cultural activities, dance, sport and recreation, jobs around the home. When children stop the urge to do a poo it’s very easy for them to get trapped in a vicious circle of withholding.When their poo hurts or they are fearful of the toilet, they find it hard to relax and are anxious it will hurt.

a paper and songs by David Denborough. First published in Clinical Psychology, issue 17, September 2002 Aside from their understandable opposition to being blamed or shamed, perhaps children are showing common sense in resisting being defined by descriptions that imply that their identities are limited or fixed. Even adults do not find rigid negative descriptions of themselves particularly motivating toward change. Why shouldn’t children resist a fixed adult-imposed definition or a normative characterization? After all, identity remains exploratory and relatively fluid well into adolescence. Unfortunately, despite all efforts relapses are common, and final remission probably depends on physical maturity.Problems with wetting are less common than soiling. The three main causes of daytime wetting ( known medically as enuresis) are:

If the constipation is severe, it may seem like your child has diarrhea, as they may pass runny or loose bowel motions. This is because the plug of hard stool obstructs the passage of normal bowel motions, and the loose or runny stool passes around it.One method is to use a graduated approach to the final goal of using the toilet appropriately. The first step is to allow the child to pass a motion as they usually do, but (a) only into a nappy, and (b) only in the toilet area. These requirements are the beginning of "shaping up" more appropriate toileting behaviour. The next step is for the child to defecate into a nappy while sitting on the toilet, then while sitting on the toilet with the nappy held a little distance away from their bottom. Finally, everyone agrees that the nappy is just getting in the way and is no longer needed. These children (usually boys) have never been reliably clean for more than a few weeks or perhaps a few months at a time. They are most unlikely to pass a full motion into their pants, and have no anxiety about using the toilet, but will soil their pants most days to a level which is immediately apparent to others nearby. Although the smell is very noticeable to others, these children seem not to be aware of it, or to be worried by the physical discomfort of dirty pants. This third group, who continue soiling into their primary school years, is quite unlike the first two groups because there is - or is likely to be - a genuine physical reason for the continued soiling. When the bowel is working normally, children should produce a soft, easy to pass poo at least 4 times a week. Ideally, children should pass some soft poo every day. White, M. (1986). Negative explanation, restraint and double description: A template for family therapy. Family Process, 25(2), 169-184.