Counselling for Toads: A Psychological Adventure

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Toad's father was a harsh one; in his eyes, Toad was useless and needed to be guided by him. His father always believed that he was right and that Toad was wrong. When Toad's father died, the big, strict Badger took his place. When Toad sees Badger, he immediately thinks of his father, especially when Badger is criticizing him. A clever intertwining of the tale of Toad and the intricate thought processes behind the science of counselling... a classic journey of discovery, triumph and pain." - Book of the Day, Glasgow Herald Drawing on the figure of Toad, who is a rather pompous yet affectionate character who has fallen into depression, de Board takes us on a journey through the theory of Eric Berne’s classical transactional analysis. Toad goes to see Heron, the local counsellor, who is a gentle, kind, thoughtful, serious yet confrontational person, the type of person one would hope to meet in a counsellor. The theory is described clearly yet convincingly through the client/counsellor relationship with plentiful uses of metaphor, good humour, and irony that make us smile indulgently, not only at Toad but also at ourselves at times as we recognise some of our own frailties." - Helena Hargaden, psychotherapist, counsellor, and transactional analyst, author of Transactional Analysis: A Relational Perspective These are the effects of Toad's family environment, and they are the source of his current depression. This engaging pastiche of Kenneth Grahame's riverbank classic... manages to be not only instructive and, at times, extremely amusing, but also to remain remarkably faithful to the cheery, bucolic spirit of the original... extremely enjoyable." - Paul Sussman, in the Independent on Sunday

Over 3 million copies sold worldwide and translated into seven languages! For over 25 years Counselling for Toads has provided readers with a warm and engaging introduction to counselling, brought to life by Toad and his friends from Kenneth Grahame’s The Wind in the Willows . Over the course of ten sessions, which correspond to chapters of the book, a very depressed Toad learns how to analyse his own feelings and develop his emotional intelligence using the language and ideas of transactional analysis. He meets his ‘rebellious child’ and his ‘adult’ along the way and by the end of the book, Toad is setting out on a completely new adventure – as debonair as he ever was. Readers will learn about the counselling process and themselves as they join Toad on his journey from psychological distress to psychological growth and development. A must-read for anyone approaching counselling for the first time, whether as a student or as a client, or for the professional counsellor looking for something to recommend to the hesitant. Counselling for Toads by Robert De Board – eBook DetailsCounselling for Toads begins with Toad plunging into one of his periodic bouts of depression, but this time he cannot seem to snap out of it. His friends become so concerned about his mental state that they arrange for him to see Heron. Toad reluctantly agrees to go, but at first he is rather uncooperative with Heron's attempts to get him to talk about his feelings. Gradually, however, Toad begins to open up. People who choose the “I’m not okay; you’re okay” position have low self-esteem. They think they are terrible, and others are better than themselves. They see themselves as victims in life and often feel pathetic and weak. Their minds are liable to remember sad and unhappy events, while they tend to forget or ignore the good times. When encountering an unpleasant situation, they always try to find the problem within themselves. These characteristics make people on this scale more prone to depression, like Toad with his low self-worth. Over the course of ten sessions, which correspond to chapters of the book, a very depressed Toad learns how to analyse his own feelings and develop his emotional intelligence using the language and ideas of transactional analysis. He meets his 'rebellious child' and his 'adult' along the way and by the end of the book, Toad is setting out on a completely new adventure – as debonair as he ever was. Through this anthropomorphic parable, de Board takes readers into a realistic, humorous, and humane account of being in psychotherapy. I suspect that Toad would find great pleasure to know that this story of his life, struggles, and recovering is still being read 25 years since its original publication. Counselling for Toads offers an overview of the basics of transactional analysis in practice. In the 25 years since the book was written, transactional analysis has continued to evolve and is now a model of human relations work applied in psychotherapy, counselling, education, and organizational development." - William F. Cornell, MA, TSTA, editor of the Routledge book series, Innovations in Transactional Analysis , and editor of Into TA: A Comprehensive Textbook on Transactional Analysis. For over 25 years Counselling for Toads has provided readers with a warm and engaging introduction to counselling, brought to life by Toad and his friends from Kenneth Grahame’s The Wind in the Willows.

First, Toad habitually ignores his true feelings. When Heron asks him how he is feeling today, Toad blurts out, “Quite well, thank you.” This automatic response robs Toad of a chance to really get in touch with his feelings. In fact, Toad never faces his emotions. He always subconsciously avoids self-reflection. When he goes to a party, regardless of his current mood, he immediately adopts a polite social mode, and his opening line is always the same: “Hello, friends, you'll never guess what I've been up to,” or “Come, my friend, look at this.” No one gets a chance to ask, “Are you okay?” No one asks, “How are you?” So he seldom examines his own feelings. Best-selling author, Robert de Board says: 'Toad's experiences are based on my own experiences of counselling people over a period of twenty years. Counselling for Toads is really an amalgamation of the many counselling sessions I have held and contains a distillation of the truths I have learnt from practice.' A delightful book which... offers a gentle introduction to transactional analysis and much more." - Relate NewsThis makes Toad feel that he is weak and inferior, and has taught Toad to hide his true emotions. He is afraid to express his true thoughts and is also very concerned about the judgement of others. On the other hand, Toad's love of a lively atmosphere and the limelight also relates to his childhood where he wasn’t given enough attention.